Nov 28, 2006

I give the Thanks now....


Just a few things I am thankful for this season.

- Sliding Glass Doors - This deserved to be mentioned twice. Because every once in a while a loved one will drunkenly walk right into one because they don't see it. Maybe it will happen on your birthday. Maybe, just maybe, it will be the funniest thing you will ever see in your life. God, I love sliding glass doors!

- Jeff Bridges - Because he should have won an Academy Award for The Big Lebowski. His work in the bathtub with the "nice marmot" was priceless. The Dude abides.

- December in Key West - Yeah, I know I'm repeating things....whatever. Slyde keeps talking about his three week vacation this coming December. Yeah, but is he gonna spend it drinking in cool bars in a semi-tropical setting? Don't think so! HA!

- Blogging - when I'm supposed to be working. Fuck!

- All of my nieces and nephews - One of them drew me a birthday card this past weekend with gas coming out of ass with this little birthday message: "Happy Birthday, Uncle Farty Lumpy!" Yeah...that's special. Don't even ask me where Farty Lumpy comes from. It had nothing to do with me...initially.

- Guinness - I know I could probably live without it, but who the hell would want to?

- The 12 Bars of Christmas - It's this amazing annual Holiday party that we throw. We visit 12 bars in our little town in one night. A half hour and at least one drink at each place. Plus, we sing the 12 Days of Christmas at each bar. But we only go up to the bar number that we are at. Get it? So at the fifth bar we start with "On the fifth day of Christmas my true love gave to me...." and so on. We start out with maybe 20-25 revelers, but by the 8th or 9th bar we usually grow to twice that number. Just from people that are out and think what we are doing is cool. Even though it's not. Actually, it's kinda gay.

6 comments:

Kat said...

Not gay at all. Sounds very appealing to a lady (who said that?)-chick who's not had a lick a booze in 9 months.

HEY LIZ!
We're so doing this next year!
And we'll wear shirts that say On the 1st day of christmas Uncle Farty Lumpy gave to me the gift of drinking myself silly!

B.E. Earl said...

This year, the party comes on the day I come back from 2 weeks in Key West.

My liver is really gonna hate me.

Anonymous said...

Mr farty lumpy... i like it...

from henceforth, that will be your new moniker....

Anonymous said...

aw farty lumpy i wanna go with! thats such a fun idea. talk about getting drunk really fast!

lol @ your pic. for some reason... it fits you perfectly. :p


so farty, your gonna bring me back a shot glass right? or should i call you Mr. Lumpy?

B.E. Earl said...

Slyde - My neice has the loudest voice in the world and whenever she sees me in a crowd she yells out "FARTY LUMPY!!!!!!!". So feel free to call me whatever you wish...nothing can embarrass me.

Yas - You can just call me chubbsy-ubsy. Sorry. Old Little Rascals reference.

My pic is from redmeat.com. It's an online comic strip and one of the characters is Bug-Eyed Earl. Hence, B.E. Earl. Ta da!

melanie said...

I loved the Big Lebowski! it set me on a White Russian/Purple pantsuit jag though... giggles. DUDE!

yea yea. Dec in Key West... you and all your rich friends!

oooooo blogging when i should be working. I am soooo guilty! Uncle farty... whats with the lumpy?

Guiness, is there a song devoted to that wonderous beverage? there should be!

Can i do the 12 bar rotation with yaz? I am just sayin.

happy holidays Earl! :kiss: