Nov 15, 2012

Overheard

A semi-true story.

At the cat ranch in the living room while flipping through the cable channels, we came across a "reality" show called Doomsday Preppers. These are folks who are convinced that a financial or environmental cataclysmic event will happen soon, so they are preparing by building bunkers, hoarding canned/jarred food and bottled water. Stuff like that. This one couple said they work 6-8 hours a day on fortifying their stronghold. And they take personal defense courses. And cooking courses. And time at the shooting range. I have no idea when they actually sleep.  That's when this conversation ensued:

Me (sheepishly): I think, ya know, if I had tons and tons of disposable cash and didn't have to work for a living...I might, ya know, do something like this.

She (incredulously): Do something like what? Build a fallout shelter? Prepare for the apocalypse? Why? Do you think it's gonna happen soon.

Me: No, not really.

She: So why would you do it?

Me: Well, if I had all that time and money on my hands I think I would be bored. I'd need a hobby. That seems like a decent one.

She: Really?

Me: Yeah, you know...just in case.

She: A hobby, eh? Why wouldn't you just go do some work for a charity or something? If you had all that time and money on your hands, I mean.

Me: Oh, man...full-tiime charity work? That's sounds exhausting.

I'm a jackass, apparently.

12 comments:

Slyde said...

ya know, if you are going to copy my blog entry styles, the least you could do it give me credit....

... or a reacharound...

Chef Files said...

Hmmm... hoarding sacks of dried beef jerky in every crack and crevice is no for you Mr Earl. Howsabout we open a bar in Hawaii with just 2 stools and crack wise about baseball, bourbon and babes? Every other day we will take it in turns to cook up rashers of bacon and play at being the barman?

Or... we could go back to hanging out in a concrete bunker with every other weird bell-end on the planet.

B.E. Earl said...

Slyde - You are an inspiration to me every day. Except that your "he said/she said" entries usually are about making fun of your wife. Mine are about making fun of myself. I have more grace than you. :)

Chef - I like that idea about the bar in Hawaii with 2 stools. Let's work on that.

Waterlogged Canine said...

Doomsday Preppers are fucking crazy!

Until they aren't.

The greatest charity you could ever contribute to is yourself. Do you. I said it!

B.E. Earl said...

Doggie - Woof.

Dr Zibbs said...

Slyde invented using dialog? Whoa!

RW said...

There are a couple things unique to America that you can't find in most other places in the world. One of them is creationism, and another is doomsday prepping. Oh wait, and also beauty pageants for toddlers.

You can learn a lot about America on the cable channels. Most of it damning...

downtown guy said...

You know, it is basically just adults building clubhouses and then doing scout style stuff, but with more emphasis on killing (fill in the blank with unrealistic enemies). I'm not above saying that I have considered that it would be fun to have a grown up scout troop. Plus beer.

B.E. Earl said...

Zibbs - Apparently.

RW - It's a fucking wasteland out there.

Hank - My theoretical dream bunker/clubhouse/man-cave will have plenty of beer and bourbon. And some way to make ice because...well, you know. Cold beer and bourbon on the rocks tastes good.

Annabelle Archer said...

Awe. RW has made me a little sad. Mostly because of being so right.

Do you think they (the preppers) are ever super disappointed that their efforts are (so far) all for nothing?

B.E. Earl said...

AA - I believe they all secretly want some kind of doomsday scenario to happen. There I days I look around at the world and think the same thing. Then I get better. Bourbon helps.

Gorilla Bananas said...

I wonder if anyone will use it as a sex toy.