Sep 29, 2008

Tales From the Crapper

That's where I've been all weekend. Well, not really. Just seems that way. There I three things that will guaranfuckintee me a solid (?) couple of days on the crapper. 1) Chili, even my own concoction. 2) Lots of beer. I always drink plenty of beer, but I'm talkin' LOTS OF BEER. I did that this weekend. 3) Thai food. I could eat Thai food every night. Larb, Massaman, Tom Kha Gai...I could eat that shit every night. I love Thai food. But Thai food doesn't love me. Wanna guess what was I had to eat and drink this weekend?

That's right. Copious amounts of chili, beer and Thai food. And the occasional trips to the crapper are actually less frequent than I anticipated going into the weekend. What with the three points of the Bermuda Crapper Triangle on the menu. They are my own personal Axis of Evil. Except I am willing to engage in negotiations without any preconditions, unlike our current regime. I mean administration.

For those interested in this kind of thing, I made the chili (see yesterday's post), Gia's sister made the Thai food (better than any Thai restaurant I've been to) and the beer was made by the glorious beer elves that reside in the land of hops and malt somewhere over the rainbow. They work tirelessly to bless us with their sweet nectar. Oh thank you beer elves! We love you!

You know who else spent the weekend on the crapper?

The New York Mets.

Ouch.

17 comments:

Mrs. Hall said...

You blogged about your bowels

huh.

Better than the crap I write.

(rim shot)

HA! a joke there! Just made that up! Ima funny girl!

Wait, now that I read it again, it isn't that funny. Maybe it would have been funnier if I would have said, "better than the crap you normally write." But that would be mean.

Well, whatever...

thanks folks, i'll be here all week, tip your waitresses!

But seriously Earl, light a match already!

pure evyl said...

The beer elves rule!!!

B.E. Earl said...

Mrs. Hall - a match might cause a methane explosion with all the gas I've got tonight.

Evyl - Don't they just?

mr zig said...

mmmmmm beer and chilli - I could use that! oh wait, its only 7:30 in the morning... too early for beer?

B.E. Earl said...

Mr Zig - think other time zones. :)

Slyde said...

is THAT why you just hung up on me telling me you had to poop? its carrying over to this morning?

Dr Zibbs said...

The trips were less frequent than you anticipated?..Looks like you need some help on your forecasting.

teeni said...

I hope you are feeling better. It's nice that you know someone who makes great homemade Thai food! I need to get it more and try some of the dishes you mentioned because I haven't had much but I have liked what I've tried.

B.E. Earl said...

Slyde - Nah...you were just boring me.

Dr. Zibbs - And I'm usually spot on with that kind of thing.

Teeni - Oh, I felt great. Crapping is a wonderful experience. ;)

Heff said...

Good God man - In MODERATION. MODERATION !!! Next time add a healthy portion of cheese to your diet and you may come out o.k.

Michelle J said...

b.e. poop talk is my specialty!! Contact me for more discussion of this very serious topic!!!

We can meet and have a beer and some chili OK??

M

lotus07 said...

T. M. I.

B.E. Earl said...

Heff - I sprinkled some cheddar on top of my chili. Does that count?

Michelle - I'm only comfortable talking about poop within the semi-anonymous confines of my blog. In the real world...it freaks me out. :)

Lotus - What? I didn't go into consistency or stench. THAT would have been TMI.

Michelle J said...

b.e. you disappoint!!!

Paige Stanton said...

I'm with you all the way on Tahi food. I could eat it every day for every meal!

B.E. Earl said...

Michelle - of course I do.

Paige - I could also eat Greek food every night. Or Italian food. Or sushi. Or...

elizabeth said...

Only you buddy - could write an entire post about crap and for some reason not surprise me at all.