May 4, 2009

X-Men Origins: Wolverine

First of all, I'm not posting this on the MovieGrenade because, well, that site is supposed to be for bad films that we are trying to warn you against seeing. We watch 'em so you don't have to, and all that crap.

But X-Men Origins: Wolverine is a movie that really needs no warnings of the kind. If you are going to see it, you are going to see it. Regardless of the press it gets. Or of the opinion of some faceless, nameless blogger like myself.

But I'm gonna give it to you anyway.

I joined Slyde in the early morning drizzle on Saturday to be the first 40-year old kids on the block to see this one. I live on a small block. Slyde was so excited he got to the theater a full 45 minutes before the film started. The theater wasn't open yet, so he had to walk around the outlet shopping area in the drizzle. Silly boy.

I was hoping the film would be in IMAX, but alas...no. That's kinda the reason I picked this theater. That and the close proximity to Chipotle Grill.  Fat boy gotta eat. 

I thought it was a solid film.  Nothing spectacular.  No "Wow!" moments.  Just a solid waste of around 2 hours.  And there is nothing wrong with that.  They messed with a lot of backstory elements for a lot of the characters in this film, but I found myself not caring that much.  I knew they were gonna do it, so why bother getting worked up about it?  I just rolled with the adamantium punches.

A quick rundown:  Hugh Jackman and Liev Schreiber are a ferocious pair of war-mongering douchebags who don't appear to age or suffer any long-term effects of bayonets, bullets or cannon shots to the gut.  They "join" a covert group of ruffians each with their own unique abilities, until Jackman discovers he has a conscience.  It must have been under his facial hair somewhere.  Flash forward a bunch of years and someone is picking off members of the dream team, or so we are led to believe.  Jackman is convinced to undergo a bonding experience with some heavy metal, and before you can say snickety-snickt he winds up with the girl, the gold watch and everything.

OK.  It didn't happen exactly like that.  But like I said before, if you are going to see this film then you are going to see this film.  Doesn't matter much what I say.

And I say there are worse ways to spend a rainy Saturday morning.  It wasn't great, but you probably knew that already from the trailers.  It wasn't even very good.  But it was...solid.  Like a good crap.

PS - I thought Gambit was decently portrayed in the film.  I have no idea what he was doing in Wolverine's origin story, but I stopped reading/collecting comics a long time ago.  Maybe Marvel changed the story again.  I dunno.


________________________________________________________

Note: Remember to play the Bug-Eyed Trivia Challenge every day. Ryan Reynolds?  Really?.

22 comments:

Diesel said...

Iron Man and the Chris Nolan Batman movies have really raised the bar for superhero movies. Sounds like this one doesn't quite measure up. Too bad; it could have been great.

mikeb302000 said...

Earl, Sorry for not taking the time to investigate it myself, but where did you post about Planet Terror? I just saw it for the first (and last) time this weekend. What did you think of it?

I'll get to the X Men sooner or later.

Michelle said...

Interesting about X-Men but more importantly is did you eat at Chipotle Grill and how was it???

2abes said...

Nothing like a solid daily crap! I sort of expected this movie to be average at best.

Avitable said...

This really wasn't tied to the comics, so people like Gambit are just superfluous characters added in regardless of the original stories.

I thought it was miserable. There was no actual plot to speak of, no character development, horrible CG, and for some reason PG-13 meant that they couldn't show violence or blood, even though this was a group of mercs who kill people. It was a neutered movie by a shitty director.

When you have actual talent directing films, you get good stories like Dark Knight, Iron Man, Spider-Man, etc. This ranks up there with Catwoman and Punisher.

Slyde said...

i liked it less than you did...

i'll probably put my review up later...

B.E. Earl said...

Diesel - Actually, I thought it was the first two X-Men films that set the bar so high. They were both excellent.

MikeB - it's in my archives someplace. I saw that you hated it, and I didn't really like it the first time i saw it either. But it grew on me. Like a mold. ;)

Michelle - I did wind up getting Chipotle that afternoon. Delish as always.

2abes - That's what I expected too. It didn't disappoint.

Avitable - I think I am one of the few people who kinda liked the Punisher (Thomas Jane) flick. And I did equate this film to taking a crap, so i know it wasn't high art by any means. No where near the league of the films you mentioned. It was what I expected. A waste of time, and sometimes a waste of time is all I need.

Slyde - But did you like it when I rubbed your thighs when Jackman took his shirt off.

Avitable said...

I didn't mind Punisher either, even if it wasn't really the Punisher. I just think it could have been better.

And since the X-men movies (well, the first two) were so good, I really had high hopes that they'd be able to keep up that level of quality with Wolverine.

B.E. Earl said...

Avitable - it also fell into the same trap as the comic-books (under a bad writer) often do. Too many characters, not enough exposition. Made it hard to care about secondary characters like Kestrel, Blog, Maverick, Bolt (is that who Dominic Monaghan was?), Silver Fox, etc... And in looking at the credits on IMDB, why was there a different actor than Ryan Reynolds listed as Weapon XI? Was that someone else at the end as Deadpool? I dunno and I dunreallycare.

B.E. Earl said...

Hehe...I typed Blog instead of Blob in that last comment.

Hehe. A comic-book character named Blog. That would be funny.

New York City's Watchdog said...

I think that for what it was... which is a cash in on a popular character in a big franchise... it was okay. I went in expecting the drastic variance from the original comic storyline, the lack of time spent on the huge cast, and the lack of a plot. What I didn't expect was the cheesy CGI, poor ass effects, and gaping holes left open.

Like the whole "Nature" keyword that Stryker uses in X2 to retract Wolverine's claws. Huge hole left unresolved in a movie that should have resolved it.

As for Gambit, he's been clamored for by the fanboys for quite some time. It's also important to note that his name shows up in a file in the Lake Base in X2... so its totally plausible that he would be "the one that got away". I think he was really underused though... and while they did alter the way his powers worked... his lack of a serious cajun makes it just another miserable character rendering much how they made Dead Pool into a zombie like thing.

So overall... it was just okay.

B.E. Earl said...

Dawg - yeah, that about sums it up. And using Stryker's son as a means to control mutants in two out of the four films is just bad storytelling. I don't know enough about Deadpool to get worked up about the inconsistencies with his character. I never really liked the character.

Callie said...

Yeah - I'm totally waiting for the DVD on this one.

Kidlet enthused last week that Gambit was in the movie, hoping that it would spark my interest. I told her that, sadly, I knew they were going to mess with the character canon, and I wasn't going to bother with it.

Good Lord - am I THAT much of a geek? Yikes!

Ookami Snow said...

I think I am over comic book movies for a bit, however I would see a Gambit movie if they made one. Growing up he was my favorite super hero.

B.E. Earl said...

Callie - nothing wrong with being a geek.

Ookami - Never really cared for him myself.

Dr Zibbs said...

I bet Slyde was stopping by pay phones to check to see if anyone else left him messages on his Snapvine recorder wasn't he?

Yeah. He was.

Slyde said...

my review is up now.. its alittle harsher than yours..

zibbs: i check it every day like a kid on christmas morning. Sadly, i havent gotten alot of messages so far..

Heff said...

DishNetwork, here it comes...

B.E. Earl said...

Zibbs - and I haven't left him a message yet, although he told me that a couple of folks think that I have.

Slyde - will go check it out.

Heff - Only if you are in the mood for PG-13 violence.

marty mankins said...

I'm sure I will see this, as I enjoyed the previous XMEN movies. But it may be a couple more weeks out.

~E said...

I'd only go see it to see Hugh Jackman all Wolverined up and half naked.

So don't tell me there won't be any half naked scenes. I won't believe you anyway.

B.E. Earl said...

Marty - the FX weren't worth seeing it in the theater. Wait until the DVD.

~E - That's why I went to see it. ;)