Are You Ready For the Alien Apocalypse?

Because that's gonna happen, or so says noted braniac and human voicebox, Stephen Hawking.  He throws some numbers into his computer brain and the output doesn't look good for humanity. 

“We only have to look at ourselves to see how intelligent life might develop into something we wouldn’t want to meet. I imagine they might exist in massive ships, having used up all the resources from their home planet. Such advanced aliens would perhaps become nomads, looking to conquer and colonize whatever planets they can reach.”

He goes on to suggest that even trying to come into contact with extraterrestrial life could be "a little too risky" for we simple denizens of Earth.  He compares the result of such contact with the results of Christopher Columbus' discovery of the Americas and the subsequent near-genocide of the native peoples here.  Instead of blankets infested with small-pox, we might get some kind of deceptively awful comfort technology infected with nano-pox.  Or cyber-bugs.  Or some other kind of dangerous sci-fi malady.

So no cute and cuddle Ewoks or whatever the fuck race ET belonged to for us.  No way, we get our worst nightmares multiplied by ten-fold.  Or so says the smartest man this side of Johnny Cash.

But maybe there is something else going on here.  You know, I've never been comfortable with Stephen Hawking.  Something about that dude that I've never trusted, and I've never been able to put my finger on it until just this moment.

Think about it.  When the Alien Apocalypse comes, what will be the form of our destroyers?  As we will not be able to understand their native alien (?) tongue, they will have to communicate with us through some kind of complicated artificial means.  They will most likely need some kind of sophisticated machinery to use as a mode of transportation in our gravity dense world.  And they will almost certainly be much, much more intelligent that we are.  Sound familiar?

I'm telling you...this guy is a sleeper agent for the First Invasion.  He and his race don't want us to actively search for extra-terrestrial life.  They want their invasion to be a surprise.  So they came up with this ridiculous ploy out of a Michael Bay film.  Like we were gonna fall for that.

You almost pulled one over our sleepy eyes, Stephen Hawking.  But we are on to you and your plans.  The resistance begins now.  The rest of you have been warned!

___________________________________________________

Note: Remember to play the Bug-Eyed Trivia Challenge every day. Creepy is as creepy does.