Mar 1, 2010

I have a weird

How ya doin', kids? Welcome to March. Remember to go play my trivia game. It's a brand new month and a brand new game, so hit it.  Maybe one of us can knock Limpy off the big board.

So about three times this past week I had a thought that began with "I have a weird..." Since there is no such thing as an original meme anymore, I figured I would post a derivative meme. Meaning, I've seen some like this, but not exactly. Huh, what? Anyway, here goes:
  • I have a weird head.  I look at other people and they seem perfectly comfortable wearing winter hats.  They put them on and it appears that they stay on.  You know the ones I'm talking about.  A plain old woolen hat that you either pull down over your ears or just have sitting on your head.  Me?  Nah...doesn't work that way.  My wool hats don't like to stay on.  I pull one on and it stays there for about a minute.  Then it slowly begins to creep up until it is barely sitting on my head and I look even stupider than I normally do.  Frustrating.  I have a weird head.
  • I have a weird body.  You know what never works for me?  Wrapping a towel around my waist after I shower.  It won't stay.  I see movies and TV shows where guys walk around for 15 minutes with a towel wrapped around their waists.  Not me.  I can't even just stand there blow-drying my hair (shut up!) without the thing falling down around my ankles.  Maybe I'm just too well-endowed.  Maybe not.  I dunno.  I have a weird body.
  • I have a weird sense of humor.  While visiting some members of my family over the weekend, my 7 year-old niece fell down and hurt herself.  Not badly, but she did cry for a while.  I know most people laugh when other folks fall down, and some especially love when children fall down.  I'm one of those people.  But I still got a kick out of it even after I realized that she was kinda hurt.  Maybe it's because she was being annoying right before that.  I dunno.  I have a weird sense of humor.
  • I have a weird sleep disorder.  I swear, before the dawn of the Internet I thought I was crazy.  I have Restless Leg Syndrome.  Sounds like something that hypochondriacs make up, but there it is.  A real thing.  Or so says the Internets.  Even describing it to someone sounds crazy.  "Well, it's like there is a mouse or some small creature running INSIDE my leg.  Like under the skin.  I know...crazy".  I have a weird sleep disorder.
  • I have a weird dream life.  When I finally do fall asleep, you wouldn't believe the crazy shit that pops out from my subconscious in the form of dreams.  Really detailed movie plots with a soundtrack and character development and popcorn and guest-stars, both from my real life and from the entertainment world.  I tried describing just one of them to Gia the other day and she just shakes her head at me.  Apparently, I have a weird dream life.
I also have a weird cat and a weird friend named Slyde, but we'll get to those another time.

How about you?  What's weird about you?


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Note: Remember to play the Bug-Eyed Trivia Challenge every day. Seriously, if we team up we can beat Limpy.  I'm sure of it.

32 comments:

Steph said...

Sorry about that deletion. I hate typos. Anyway, here's what I said:

I'm definitely borrowing this one.

Don't worry about your weirds. People without them are boring and live pointless lives, while people with them end up being people I'd like to drink with.

Maybe the Blue Note one day?

Mrs. Holly Hall said...

i get obsessed every other week. it's a different obsession. Then i research my obsession until I am satisfied. It's usually something media related (a tv show, a movie). Then there are the obsessions in my real life. like when getting preggers I researched the ovulation process, how sperm are made, etcetera. then I tell mr. hall about my findings in great details. and he listens. ;)

so wikipedia is kind of like crack because of this :)

take care :)

B.E. Earl said...

Steph - anytime!

Holly - so you have a weird obsession with Wikipedia. Is that what you are saying? :)

Water Logged Canine said...

I have a counting compulsion. For example, the number of pulls on a paper-towel lever (needs to be 9), or the number of sips from a drinking fountain (can vary based on thirst, but needs to be divisible by 3). These examples are tip of the iceberg...but I count a lot of things...like a lot.

Never told anyone that before, and now I've told a friend and a bunch of strangers...kinda empowering.

Slyde said...

you ALSO give one really weird Blowjob....

B.E. Earl said...

Doggie - I don't think we can hang anymore. Sorry.

Slyde - See the problem with you, besides not being funny at all, is that you aren't even trying with your faux insults. The whole post was "I have a weird" something, not "I give a weird" something. Lazy, lazy, lazy douchebag.

Slyde said...

so you don't DENY that you give one fucking weird blowjob then?

Slyde said...

p.s. im VERY fucking funny...

B.E. Earl said...

Slyde - yes, I will admit that in our relationship you are the one with the more impressive fellatio skills. And no...you aren't funny.

hello haha narf said...

i give a great blowjob.

wait, i'm supposed to comment on the post, not the comment battle with you and your boyfriend.

ok...well, you aren't the only one with a weird head. my big ole noggin can't keep a hat on either.

B.E. Earl said...

Becky - He does prattle on, doesn't he? I hate when I see someone wearing a perfectly fitting skull cap. Maybe it's because of our long, luxurious hair!

hello haha narf said...

nope, not the hair. i just have a massive head. runs in my family.
i had the pleasure of attending dinner and a concert with mel blount (former pittsburgh steelers player who is known for wearing cowboy hats) a few years ago. after several drinks what little filter i have disappeared and i asked mel if i could wear his cowboy hat. he told me it would be too big, that it would fall down over my eyes and i wouldn't be able to see the concert. laughing, i told him about big heads running in my family. he put the hat on my head and found it fit perfectly.

i gotta big fucking head.

white rabbit said...

Vot iss zis 'blowjob' of vich you speak?

Vere can I find vun?

white rabbit said...

ps male persons need not apply....

B.E. Earl said...

Becky - big heads run in my family too. My nephew looks like a lollipop.

Wabbit - Slyde will be disappointed.

savannah said...

weird feet
weird hair
hold on, bless your heart, y'all almost got me to tell

all

about

my

weird...



xoxoxo

RW said...

There are faces in the carpeting...

B.E. Earl said...

Savannah - I'll never tell. ;)

RW - exactly.

Bruce said...

I never thought I would see the day when this type of film was actually considered a 'genre'.

Bruce said...

I read some pretty frickin weird blogs......does that count?

B.E. Earl said...

Bruce - I'm guessing you are talking about Dead Snow, but you left it on the wrong post. But yeah...Nazi Zombies are a genre unto themselves.

Bruce2 - only if this is one of them. ;)

sybil law said...

I have a weird head. It's small. I feel like a tiny balloon head. Other people say it's fine, but I say it's small. It is.
I thought I had restless leg syndrome, but my doctor thought I had (and internalized) anxiety, and prescribed Xanax for me. It completely worked, for sleep, anyway. My thing was feeling like I needed - HD TO- get up and do a full body stretch- over and over and over. It sucked! Thank God for Xanax.
You probably never saw my dream post about when I was making out with a giant penis. Seriously. That was strange (but really very cool!).

Dr Zibbs said...

When my wife sees someone fall she laughs for 5 minutes. it's pretty funny.

B.E. Earl said...

Sybil - that's one of the symptoms of RLS, the need to get up and stretch or walk. And it's curse. Because it happens while you are trying to sleep and the last thing your body needs is to get up and walk around. Glad the Xanax is working for you. If I had a worse case of it (mine only kicks in every 3-4 nights) I would go for some medication.

Zibbs - The person falling down or your wife laughing about it? :)

Heff said...

Shit, dude. You NAME IT....

Avitable said...

I read weird blogs.

B.E. Earl said...

Heff - Hahaha!!!

Avitable - You better be referring to this one!

Ville said...

I no longer have toenails on either big toe.

I have a small pebble permanently embedded in the top of my ear.

I sneeze when the little hairs on the front of my hair line are pulled.

and my best weird of all...Steph is my best friend

B.E. Earl said...

Ville - and it's the last one that makes you lucky!

Steph said...

This is probably the funniest shitload of comments I've ever read. Of course, the absinthe helps...

Ville is my best weird. No, wait, I was HER best weird at her wedding.

Oh, forget it.

B.E. Earl said...

Steph - Blogging on absinthe? Nice!

Faiqa said...

Wow, those are all my "I have a wierd" s too! Except I don't laugh when kids get hurt, because, dude, that's messed up.