Showing posts with label Travolta sucks. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Travolta sucks. Show all posts

Feb 3, 2010

From Paris with...Cheese?

I've watched John Travolta's career with almost equal parts dread and fascination. While he's been wonderful in some great movies like Pulp Fiction, Blow Out, Get Shorty or The Boy in the Plastic Bubble (don't judge me!), he also has a ridiculously growing list of ridiculously horrible films on his resume.  I was thinking about that while watching a trailer for his newest film, From Paris with Love.

It looks truly awful.

Travolta is be-decked in his patented bad-guy clothes, even though he supposedly plays an American spy attempting to prevent a terrorist act. Spouting manic genre-specific dialogue while blowing up speeding cars with rocket launchers.  He might be "too old for this shit!", if ya know what I mean.  I can't even begin to describe how awful this film looks, even though it's based on a story written by Luc Besson...who I kinda dig.

Or you can judge for yourself by watching the red-band trailer for it down below.  It's chock-ful of Travolta chewing up the scenery.


OK, all that is bad enough, right?  Then I saw another commercial for it a few days ago.  One that, for some reason, I can't find right now to embed.  And frankly, I'm kinda tired of this subject already so I will just describe it.  The commercial ends with Travolta's character handing a bag of fast food over to the other guy saying this line:
Every man has his vices.  My vice?  A Royale with Cheese.
I shouldn't have to tell anyone what movie they are referencing there, but Quentin Tarantino is rolling over in his grave right now.  Wait?  He's not dead.  Are you sure?  Have you seen a picture of him lately?  Looks pretty dead to me.

Anyway, I've heard that there are a few surprise scenes in this film that they HAVEN'T shown in any trailer yet.  Stuff that is gonna blow everyone's brains all over the back seat of the car!
  • Travolta is gonna stop some of the terrorists by staying on that mechanical bull longer than anyone!  "Anyone" may or may not be played by Scott Glenn. 
  • At one point Travolta is gonna lose the terrorists during a car chase when he sees Kirstie Alley walking her toddler down the sidewalk.  The baby, voiced by Bruce Willis, will tell him that the terrorists "went thataway!"
  • When asked by his partner in the film why he shaved his head, Travolta will jokingly replied "Because people kept messin' with ma hair. Ya know.  I would work on ma hair for a long time and people would have to go and hit it.  They hit ma hair!"
  • Travolta and  Jonathon Rhys Meyers will fly off at the end of the film on a beautifully restored classic car that Travolta, for some reason, keeps describing as "hydro-matic".
 Gonna go watch Lost now.  Bye!

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Note: Remember to play the Bug-Eyed Trivia Challenge every day. Maybe he will take somebody's face...off.