Mar 29, 2007

I just realized...

...that when I changed the template of my blog I lost the site counter that I was using.

Oh well, no use crying over spilt milk.

Most of the hits were probably from me refreshing the page anyway.

Mar 28, 2007

Fucking tagged again

This time by Anna. Ugh, here goes


3 Things That Scare Me: People who like David Hasselhoff, sharks (they're killers, people!), Disco.

3 People Who Make Me Laugh:
Sarah Silverman, Eddie Izzard, Gia (all the time...all the time).

3 Things I Love: Watching the scenery at
The Green Parrot Bar in Key West, that first cup of coffee in the morning, a really, really, really good movie. (Gia, of course, as well)

3 Things I Hate: People who double-park or drive the wrong way in a one-way parking lot...basically people who act like they own the road, Guinness poured into a chilled glass (wtf is that, people?), mushrooms and their ilk.

3 Things I Don't Understand: the war in Iraq, mushrooms and their ilk, homophobia.

3 Things I'm Doing Right Now: avoiding work, filling out this fucking meme, listening to
The Hold Steady.

3 Things I Want To Do Before I Die: bungee jump (seriously), take an Alaskan cruise, lounge in an eternity pool.

3 Things I Can Do: juggle...I mean, not well but I can juggle, predict meaningless things (like songs played on the radio, or home runs by singles hitters...nothing on a grand scale, but I do "shine" a little bit), tell you the exact issue number of any important comic book in my collection and many more that I wish I owned.


3 Things I Can't Do: Tell someone right away that they are annoying me (it usually takes multiple occurrences), whistle through my fingers, spell "parallel" without spell-check (and it still doesn't look right).

3 Things I Think You Should Listen To: your parents (for the most part), your significant other (for the most part), your heart. Awwwww.

3 Things You Should Never Listen To: Bad advice (duh!), Nickelback, Mets fans.

3 Things I'd Like To Learn: as many different languages as possible, guitar (but I'm afraid that my fingers don't work that way), self-discipline.

3 Shows I Watched As A Kid: The Kids from C.A.P.E.R. (I dare anyone to remember this show), Happy Days, WKRP in Cincinnati.

3 Bloggers I've tagged: No one of importance. Let the madness end now, people.


EDIT - Apparently, the proper name for the pool I was looking for was an infinity pool, not an eternity pool. Do a google image search on "infinity pool" and you will see some of the greatest acheivements in mankind. Seriously!

Mar 23, 2007

Must. See. Now!!!

OK. There are a whole lot of movies that I have waited forever to see. Some I've been disappointed in (AI), some exceeded my wildest expectations (The Lord of the Rings trilogy), and some have downright sucked (hello, George Lucas?).

But there is a tri-fecta of films out that are soon to be released that I CANNOT WAIT FOR. Seriously, I feel like Cartman waiting for the Wii to come out. C'mon.....C'MON!!!!

The first one actually hits the theaters today, and if I can convince the woman to go out tonight then I will be seeing it shortly. It's called Shooter, and it's based on a book by Stephen Hunter (film critic for the Washington Post) called Point of Impact.

It's a great read. Pure popcorn, and it reads almost like a screenplay. Not far-fetched considering the author's day job. I can't believe that it's taken as long as it has for it to reach the big screen. Mark Wahlberg may be all wrong for the title character, but I don't care! As long as it successful and they keep making sequels. Hunter has written a bunch more novels since that first one dealing with either the main character (Bob Lee Swagger) or his father (Earl Swagger...nice name, eh?). Great stuff.

The second film shouldn't be a surprise. It's Grindhouse by two of the least "Hollywood" directors in the business. Quentin Tarantino and Robert Rodriguez. They've also enlisted the help of Eli Roth, Edgar Wright and Rob Zombie for some fake trailers for the "double feature".

This one looks like it can't miss. I mean, Rose McGowan has a freakin' rifle/rocket launcher for a prosthetic leg fer crissakes! What trumps that? Nothing, in my book.

Should be fun to see good-guy Kurt Russell play a baddie in the "Deathproof" segment. Or Freddy Rodriguez play a killing machine in the "Planet Terror" segment. Or Rose McGowan with a freakin' rifle/rocket launch..., oh...sorry. Already said that. Great, great stuff!

The last film in my "2 Die 4" trilogy would be Spider-Man 3. A bit weird for me because I wasn't looking forward to the first Spider-Man film at all. But Sam Raimi and Tobey Maguire got it right. And they got it even, er, righter (?) in Spider-Man 2. So if things progress this way, then Spider-Man 3 should be the best....film....EVER!!!!!!

Well, maybe the best super-hero movie ever. Notice I didn't say comic-book adaptation ever. Sorry kids...that's got to go to Sin City. Hands down.

Don't even try to argue with me on that last point. Useless, I tell you. Useless.

Ah, Rosie....we love ya!

Mar 17, 2007

Odin, Oden, Odin, Oden

Watching the NCAA tournament, especially the first couple of rounds, is one of my favorite thinigs. Evah! Well that and a nice mutton, lettuce and tomato sandwich. When the mutton is sliced nice and lean, and the tomatoes...they're so nice and perky, but no...

Sooo...one of the fabulous freshmen playing in the tournament this year is named Greg Oden and he plays for Ohio State. He's great, but really...who cares about that?

What I dig is his name. Oden. Sounds like Odin, the one-eyed god-king of the ancient Norse. Also the name of a really terrible hair-metal band from the 80's. That's what I like about him.

If you ever saw the film The Decline of Western Civilization Part II: The Metal Years, the band Odin was featured prominently. They were an up and coming LA band with their lead singer Randy O. They never made it as (Thank God!) hair-metal soon went the way of the dodo.

But there was this great scene in the film with the old owner of some club in LA announcing the band with the chant:

"Odin....Odin....Odin....Odin"

But it was like an old Catskills emcee from the 50's announcing them. Or Ed Sullivan. No emotion, no charge, no grrrrrrr-metal stuff. Just "Odin....Odin....Odin....Odin". Hysterical!

Anyway, everytime they mention Greg Oden on the tube, Gia and I start chanting "Oden....Oden....Oden....Oden". Then we laugh. Gia just went in the bedroom to take a nap, and I can hear her chanting it from the living room.

We're so stooopid.

Mar 13, 2007

St. Patrick's Day

Ah...the most wonderful time of the year!

The weather is warming up. The NCAA tournament is right around the corner. The Yankees will soon be playing home games in the Bronx. And, oh yeah...the Guinness is flowing.

Well it was this past Sunday, at least. Our town had their 79th annual St. Patrick's Day Parade this past weekend and it was a beeee-yoootiful day! They always hold it the Sunday before the actual day.

Having not learned my lesson from the previous week, I attempted to drink all the Guinness that my liver could withstand. Did a pretty good job of it too!

We had a dinner party over Gia's sister's house the night before the parade. Very nice. Mellow. Low-key night at home, right? Wrong!

We wound up drinking massive quantities of wine and beer before calling it a night. It was a blast. I had promised, however, to buy bagels and cream cheese for breakfast at a friend's house for the pre-parade party. I was supposed to be there by 10AM. Shouldn't have been a problem.

Except that I woke up at 9AM and forgot to turn my clock ahead an hour for Daylight Savings Time. STUPID DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME!

OK. No big deal. I called and let them know I was going to be late. Then I kissed G goodbye (blech...morning breath. Mine, not hers!), and headed out the door to the bagel place. It was halfway there that I discovered that I was still a little drunk from last night.

What's an Irish boy supposed to do on parade day when it's a little after 10AM and I'm already drunk? That's right...continue drinking.

Didn't help matters that a buddy of mine brought a flask of Irish Whiskey with him to the parade. Many, many black beers and nips of whiskey later and this drunk was feeling pretty good. Damn good, in fact.

Lots of foolishness followed. Nothing embarrassing, really. I mean, I didn't piss on any carpets or anything. Just lots of foolish fun.

Which is all we can really ask for on such a glorious day. Hope you all have a wonderful St. Patrick's Day this coming weekend. Slainte!

Update - check out the yummy goodness in the picture on the sidebar. I took that pic on what shall now be referred to as "carpet pissing" day in my household. We were at a bar called The Dublin House in NYC and this was our first round there. It looked so good I had to take a pic. Enjoy!

Mar 8, 2007

Pissers and Shitters

OK...just to state it right here and right now so that I don't hum and haw about it later on:

I peed on the carpet in the corner of our hotel room over the weekend.

My God! I still can't believe it. Even when I see it written out on the screen right there. I peed in the corner of our hotel room on the carpet. Lemme 'splain.

So on Saturday, I had a "guys day out" planned with some of my friends. We went into the city and did our version of a pub crawl. Hit a bunch of great bars. Had some decent food. Walked around alot. It was great fun.

Now Gia had a few days off and wanted to come in as well, but there were no ladies allowed on our "guys day out". Not my rules, but those were the rules. So we got ourselves a hotel room (a beautiful one-bedroom suite with a separate living area complete with a sofa-bed) for the next few days with the intention that we would pretend to be city folk. Gia asked my sister to join her in the city on Saturday and they would do their thing, while the guys did our thing. Great plan!

Well, I get back to the hotel sometime after midnight. We had been drinking since around 2:30 in the afternoon. Drinking hard at times! So you could imagine my state.

The girls weren't back yet, but I got a call saying that they were on their way. Once they arrived, the three of us headed back out to a local Irish pub a few blocks away. More good stuff flowed as Gia told me HER embarrassing story of the evening.

You see, her tummy wasn't doing too well, and she, er, well, she kinda sharted before dinner. Undergarments had to be thrown away, and the clean-up effort took about a half-hour. They were nowhere near our hotel and they had a dinner reservation just around the corner from where they were.

She was mortified, but somehow she made it through the night. Did I ever mention that this was the first time she was hanging out with one of my sisters for the evening? Niiiiiiice!

Anyway we head back to the hotel. I set up the sofa-bed for my sister and we all headed to sleep.

The next part of the story is something out of The Twilight Zone.

I had, apparently, shed all my clothes before hopping into bed because the next thing I became aware of was coming to consciousness while I was standing in the corner of our bedroom. Naked. Peeing on the carpet. WTF?

I immediately stop, and hop into bed hoping that Gia hasn't noticed. She has. She is wide awake and saying stuff like "You just peed in the corner? WTF?". I try to distract her with warm snuggling and utter gibberish, but she is having none of it. She keeps repeating "You just peed in the corner." Nothing like stating the obvious, huh?

I soon pass out once again, and I'm gone. For like 5 straight hours.

When I finally wake up, I have this strange recollection of a dream that I had last night. I had dreamed that I peed on the carpet in the corner of the room. Weird. I looked under the blanket. Naked...check. No urine stains...check. I peer into the corner of the room and there is no tell-tale wet stain...double check (but the carpet was dark, so maybe...). Phew! I HAD dreamed it. Weird dream.

Then I turn over and see Gia staring at me. Her first words were "You peed on the carpet last night." FUCK!!!!!

I gotta tell you there is no explanation in the world for this. I have been much drunker, MUCH DRUNKER, in the past than I was this particular evening...and I have always managed to make it to the bathroom. Sure, I've puked in some odd places, but peeing? This is crazy! And as Slyde keeps reminding me...I'm 40!!!! No excuses can be made.

What's weird is that everyone we have told this story, almost to a person, has laughed and said "Oh yeah, my boyfriend/husband/brother/whatever has done that when he was wasted!"

Really? It's like an epidemic or something. I do remember my older brother doing that when we were younger and sharing a room. Middle of the night. Gets up. Pees on the rug. But he was wasted and like 19 at the time.

But not me...I've always been pretty particular about where I pee.

Let's hope this doesn't start a trend.

PS - Do you like how I added Gia's embarrassing tale in the middle of mine to lessen the impact? Also, I thought real hard about posting this, but it was way too funny. And this blog is mostly anonymous. Only Gia and Slyde from my real life read it, and they already knew about it...so WTF.

Mar 7, 2007

Went away...

...for a few days with the woman.

Wanted to go away somewhere fun, but we love NYC so much (the restuarants, the bars) that we decided to just get a hotel room for a few days and hit a bunch of new places.

Good times were had. Wonderfully awful things happened.

I'll fill y'all in as soon as I recover.

Mar 2, 2007

For Kitty

Because it was requested by Kat, here is a recipe that I stole (that's right) from the NY Times a few weeks ago. It was yummy! Much more like a savory bread pudding than a soup, but equally delicous.

Soupe a l'Oignon Gratinee

1 baguette, cut into 1/2-inch slices (around 30 slices)
9 tablespoons butter, softened
9 ounces Emmental cheese, finely grated
8 medium yellow onions, finely sliced
1 tablespoon kosher/sea salt
1 cup tomato puree

1. Toast the baguette slices and coat each with butter after they have cooled. Then spread a generous layer of the Emmental cheese over them. Use all but about 1/2 cup or more of the cheese.
2. In a large saucepan, melt the remaining butter (or 4 tablespoons) and saute the onions until they are very soft and golden.
3. In a casserole dish (at least 5 quarts. I used a Dutch oven), arrange a layer of 1/3 of the bread slices. Spread 1/3 of the onions over them, followed by 1/3 of the tomato puree. Repeat for two more layers. Sprinkle the remaining grated cheese on top. To avoid boiling over, dish must not be more than 2/3 full.
4. In a saucepan, bring 1 1/2 quarts water to boil. Add the salt. Very slowly, pour the salted water into the casserole, near the edge, so that the liquid rises to the top layer of cheese without covering it. You may need more or less water.
5. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees. Put the casserole on the stove and simmer, uncovered for 30 minutes. Then transfer to hot oven and bake uncovered for 1 hour. The soup is ready when the surface is crusty, golden cake and the inside is unctuous (nice word!) and so well blended that it is difficult to discern onion from cheese. Each person is served some of the baked crust and some of the inside, which should be thick but not completely without liquid. Serves 6.

PS - Betcha y'all didn't know that I had mad kitchen skillz. OK, I promise never to type "skillz" again.