Sep 28, 2006

Little Blue Pill

A few years back a bunch of us headed into NYC to see a funk band that was playing at Le Bar Bat. It's this weird tri-level club in mid-town decorated with, well...bats!

Don't really remember who the band was or what the occasion was, all I really remember was the hottest old couple I have ever seen! And I'm talking oooooollllllllddddd! He was in his seventies and she was in her mid-sixties, at least.

But she was crackin' for a sixty-year old. I guarantee you there were dudes in the audience wishing they could hit that. I'll include myself with that group. Fake tits out to here, short little mini-skirt, kickin', I don't remember if she had a face so I can't comment on that.

Her man was not so fact he was decrepit. Bad suit, bad hair, could barely walk, but here he was with his hottie boom bottie younger woman.

What made them stand out was a 30-minute session of dirty dancing right in front of the band that just abso-fucking-lutely freaked everyone in the place out! We were mesmerized. We wanted to look away, at times, but we just couldn't. She was rockin' back and forth on his erect (yes, erect) penis that formed a large tent in his bad trousers. She was grabbing him by the ears and jamming his face into her crotch. She would turn around and bend over while he pantomimed possibly illegal sexual maneuvers behind her. She would stick his face into her ample cleavage while he made motor boat noises. BBBRRRRRMMMMSSSSKKKKYYYY!

It was awesome!

We have no idea how the old feller didn't keel over from cardiac arrest right then and there, but God bless 'em! Oh yeah, and the Pfizer Corporation for making it all possible.

I wish every evening could include something like that.


elizabeth said...

That hurt my brain.

Kat said...

I actually had a similar experience with a younger couple at that bar I used to work at.(The one with all the cool music...) Anyhoo, they were a couple of JD drinkin' swingers that were basically screwing on the dance floor before propositioning me and later my boss to join them at their hotel room. Pretty 'down-home' lookin' too. She was wearing a miniature floral,polyester, tie in the back dress with socks and runners...and he well...I believe was missing teeth. I don't think anyone wanted in the pants of either of these two.

Anonymous said...

thats just wrong...

Anonymous said...

I was there...and I must agree...I DID want to hit that. ;)


Verdant Earl said...

It was right in so many ways.

No one who was there that night left without a smile because of that couple. It was awesome!

And Steve, I thought I saw you lurking.