Dec 29, 2008

The Surreal Deal

So I had this weird dream, right? I was drinking beers with a buddy of mine and a bunch of local fisherman on a bridge by my home at around 1AM. The fisherman were also smoking weed. Didn't offer us any, but they seemed like good eggs.

Suddenly a car pulls up out of the fog (it's always foggy in dreams) flashing it's high beams at us. It's my buddy's wife and she wants to go out for a drink. So I recommend a place that I think might still be open. Once we get there we find ourselves in the middle of a trashy wedding after-party. I'm only assuming the wedding was "trashy", but considering that they wound up at this joint afterward it is probably a good bet. The bride and groom are wasted and grinding it to the silky smooth sounds of the bar band's version of "Love the One You're With". Really? Glad to see that my dream life isn't lacking in irony.

We grab a booth in the dining area to distance ourselves from the perceived losers in the bar area, when perception turns to reality. A fight breaks out. A classic sprawling bar room brawl. Amongst the wedding party. No way we were getting involved, but then I see the bride kinda in the middle of it. So I gallantly rush over to escort her out of harm's way. She pleads with me to find her husband and make sure he is okay.

So I wade into the mass of drunken idiots to find the groom. Along the way several mini-fights flare up around the edges of the larger overall fight. I tip-toe through it all. Then the fight spills into the dining area and into the booth we were occupying. I check to see that my beer is okay, and I see that one of my friends has saved it. Phew!

That's when the entire place spills out into one of the joints two parking lots and a bunch of cop cars show up to break things up. And I wondering just what kind of second-hand buzz I must have caught from those dude's fishing on the bridge.

Oh, and wasn't a dream after all. It all really happened.

How was your weekend?


Note: Remember to play the Bug-Eyed Trivia Challenge every day. All the drunken buffoons are doing it.


Mrs. Hall said...

GET the fuck out!!

Did this really happen?

Wow! Holy Good Lord there Earl!

Such interesting stuff, this life you have. Wow!

um. yeah. my weekend (well did you see the Best Christmas Ever!!! post.)


Mrs. Hall

Dr Zibbs said...

So THAT'S why I woke up with a black eye.

Heff said...

Isn't it funny that when a fight breaks out, the first order of business is protecting your beer ?

Verdant Earl said...

Holly - yeah, it really did happen. So weird.

Zibbs - I thought I recognized you.

Heff - Hey, some things are too important to neglect.

Michelle said...

Wow dude your brave and special!! And you even tippy toed through the fights!! How cool is that!! Like Tiny Tim tippy toeing through the tulips or some such shit!!!

NOW WTF were you doing getting involved in this melee!!!????

I am glad you are OK!!!

Running now, ciao!!!

Bruce Johnson said...

Nope, it was a dream..........I was the dude driving the car that pulled up out of the fog.....the highbeam switch was broken and it was driving me nuts.

I thought you looked familiar in my dream.

Ookami Snow said...

There was a fight in my rec hockey league this weekend where a player hit the ref over the head with his hockey stick (intentionally) and an ambulance had to be called.

There were also death threats.

Apparently I moved to the wild west.

pure evyl said...

Not nearly as eventful. Great save on the beer.

Verdant Earl said...

Michelle - nothing brave about it. I tip-toed around the edges of the fight.

Bruce - now it makes sense.

Ookami - death threats, eh? What the hell is wrong with people.

Evyl - I know. It's nice to have friends who have your back!

Anonymous said...

Holy hell! That is crazy. Good for you for helping the bride - that was a brave move. And better that your friend saved your beer. I don't ever want to see a wedding like that in real life, thank you very much. I would get sad thinking that is what the bride had to remember for the rest of the marriage. LOL.