I watch a lot of commercial television in the summertime. Strictly for baseball, mon freres. And there are more beer commercials during the average baseball game than beers consumed during the average game by yours truly. That's a lot of commercials.
This...this...this AWFUL commercial seems to be aired more than any other this Summer of Hate:
Oh, how I hate it. I wish I were more poetic. I would write sonnets on it's awfulness. The stupid song. The stupid people. The stupid green bottle. There is nothing to like. So I figured I would share it with you.
Didn't Coca-Cola make a commercial very similar to this back in the day? It just feels familiar in an ohmygodihatedthatwaybackwhen sort of way. I'd like to think if a creepy ballerina walked into my obviously gay bathhouse with a tray of Heineken Light, I would kick her in the twat. "Hey, we may be all hanging out in a gay bathhouse, Sister! And it may be hot, but we aren't nearly hot enough to be drinking that crap!" I would say while stomping her super-skinny ass. That would feel good.
Now I feel a little better.